This year sucks..

Unfortunately I don’t see this year getting better anytime soon.

My manager got me in the carpark on Friday to give me some food for thought in that I need to think about where I see the department etc and If a tough call needs to be made then make it .

Well DUH I felt like screaming at him and go what do you think I’ve been doing for the past 4 weeks before I canceled by annual leave.

You should never have conversations like that on a Friday as it destroys the employees ability to switch off on the weekend.

Til next time…

 

Canceled…

Unfortunately I was left with no choice, so I canceled my booking  down south  & annual leave today.

So I guess my birthday is year is canceled.

It’s not fair. Why must I constantly be the one to sacrifice and bear all the burdens ?

Til next time…

Wow what a dream….

I haven’t had a dream that vivid in a really long time.

I was a on a train coming back from a work function with my other staff members (this also was set when mum was alive and still working with us). Unbeknown to me my sister, douche bag brother and father were in the carriage in front of me.

My sister looked through the doors and caught my eye and then proceeded too storm into our carriage and start a conversation with me. She went on about about my father having major surgery next week and that he would like to see me. I responded with what makes you think I want to see him except in a pine box?

My sister turned ropable  it looked like she was about to make the biggest scene imaginable so I told her don’t you even think about it, if you say one word I will tear strips off you in front of everyone. The carriage I was in went “oooooo”

As we got to the next station I decided to jump off but my sister followed me. The dream sequence then cut to my sister shoving me off the platform and onto the tracks. I managed to recovered and get my self back onto the platform where she then did it AGAIN.

She then tried to play the victim and call the cops by trying to say that I tried to push her off. I said in the front the cops listen bitch while pointing the camera’s you’re going to jail.

One of the cops then took me to the station which happened to be that that train station and this where it got REALLY WIERD.

He went through the door and shut it, I went in after and all I find is this labyrinth of doors, desk, graffiti it looked like the a haunted house merged with a police station and I couldn’t find that cop anywhere. After searching for ages the dream eventually ended.

Til next time….

 

This year is going way too quick..

It’s halfway through May and when I should be looking forward to my week off down south for my birthday in June my stomach is in knots, because I’m constantly thinking about canceling it due to my team at work being so unreliable this year. I know I shouldn’t have to or feel compelled to do so, but if I can’t rely on them being there I may have no choice.

On the property front my bank bank balance is looking very heathy and as long as nothing dramatic happens I’m on target to move late this year or early next.

Til next time..

 

 

 

 

Excuses

We all have them, We all use them.

As an exercise I have started a book and I am writing down every excuse that enters my head.

My entries for the week so far:

  • I’m too old
  • It’s to late for me
  • I’m not smart enough or talented enough
  • I’m not outgoing enough
  • I’m too introverted
  • I’m not interesting enough
  • I’m not good enough
  • I’m too shy
  • They can do better than me
  • I don’t have the time
  • If I don’t do it no-one will
  • Either I would fuck it up or they would. So why even bother entertaining a the thought of a relationship.